Most women I talk to about their self-care routines laugh at me. “I can’t even get 5 minutes alone in the bathroom to pee!” they admit.
It’s laughable, but also tragic…and I was one of these women for years. In a world where those with the most energy garner the rewards, we women can sabotage ourselves by directing that energy wholly outward instead of balancing it with inward attention. While energy created by your mitochondria drives your life force, it can also become easily sabotaged by neglect. Your energy is a direct response to how your nourish and care for your mind and body.
Self-care is NOT selfish. The objective isn’t self-indulgence, but rather CARE. Are you one of those women who measure your worth by how much you can do for others? I was. I took on so much for others that I let myself fall into a dark crypt of robotic response to others’ needs. When I finally took a cold, hard look at my own personal health, lifestyle, and, ultimately, happiness, I realized I had no idea who I had become. My energy reserves to care for myself were desert dry. And I let myself feel the guilt and the shame for wanting to go to the gym, or buy myself a treat…or go to the bathroom! I was sitting around waiting for someone to give me permission to love myself when the person was right there, hiding under the layers of stress.
Take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself, “Do I have the energy that I need to show up and be the person I want to be? Am I fueled by my own happiness?” By shifting how you feel about yourself, you will be able to redirect that energy and show up in an even bigger way for the world. As Maya Angelou asserted, “If I am not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?”
You are worthy.
You are deserving.
You are loved.
Give yourself some grace and understanding by incorporating self-care rituals into your daily routine.
Where do you start? Right here. Right now.
Let’s begin by taking an inventory of your current “feel good” levels. On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest, rate your current levels of:
- Emotional balance
- Overall wellness
Now think about that in terms of today, the past week, and the past month.
Self-care begins by focusing on these areas and finding rituals that will bump your number up one or two notches. It is not an overnight change, but a steady process of attention you give to yourself. As you focus on these areas, you will begin to boost your self-confidence and health, and, in doing so, lower your stress levels while increasing productivity and focus.
STEP ONE – HAPPINESS INTERVIEW
You know that person in your life who always seems to be happy? The one whose energy is magnetic? The one who immediately lights up the energy in a room? Ask her to coffee or lunch and find out what sets her soul on fire. What is she doing each day for herself so she can show up with so much infectious energy? Think about her responses and how you could employ self-care routines to garner you the same energy.
STEP TWO – JOY LIST
Another form of self care that I was taught to do by my dear friend Tiffany Peterson was to make a JOY List, so get out your paper and pen! Split that paper down the middle and number 1-10 on the left and on the right columns. On the left, write down items that bring you joy that cost money; on the right, joyful options that are free. For me, I always find flowers, yoga, and books on the left, and walks on the beach, hiking, and dance parties on the right. Now, whip out your highlighter and let it gravitate to the ones that bring you the most joy, one from each column. Highlight them and focus on them for the week. You are worth it. It will move the needle towards more energy in your life, so it doesn’t need to be perfect. It’s about progress for creating the success you were born to have.
STEP TWO – MORNING ENERGY BOOST
For me, my mission and self-care fuels my energy…and my friends all know me as BIG ENERGY! The secret for me is to lock in that energy first thing in the morning. Not with coffee, but with a morning ritual that nourishes my soul and sets the tone for my day. If you haven’t listened to Episode 9 of my Podcast yet, it is all about my morning routine recommendations. How we start our morning sets the tone for the entire day, so waking up strong and in charge with a confident mindset for success will get you primed for the world. I love to look in the mirror in the morning and celebrate what I love while breathing deeply and making an intentional decision to be positive. Then, I move to the kitchen for a great breakfast full of protein and nutritional power while filling up my water bottle for the first shift of the day. Often, I have prepped an infusion the night before and set up my smoothie station for ease in the morning. I love to incorporate some movement like yoga or a quick walk before I have a quiet time of meditation and prayer while gratitude journaling and diffusing my favorite peppy essential oil blends. My favorite is Peppermint and Wild Orange in the morning. It sounds like a lot, but you can get this done in 30 minutes and greatly improve the tone of your day.
STEP FOUR – SHIFT YOUR ENERGY
Using the techniques above, allow yourself to shift into that higher energy. It will begin to translate into your health, relationships, career, and more. When you rise up from that energetic state and you are rocking that superwoman stance, you opening yourself up to more opportunities and more space for something greater. Success can mean so many things to each individual. It truly is a personal journey that you have to discover for yourself. Today’s goal is to open you up for success, whatever it may be.
STEP FIVE – CHOOSE YOU!
The final step for each of us is choosing you! Choose to honor yourself. Decide that you are worth it. Self-care only works if you allow yourself to experience the benefits. Until I could honor myself, success stalled. Choosing yourself will lead to new changes that you allow to happen. A quote that supported me in this process was, “Every next level of your life will demand a different version of you.” Change was inevitable to get to that next step…and then self-care became a part of who I am.
SHIFTING INTO SELF-CARE
It all seems so wonderful, but where do you start after you choose yourself? Just start small and begin incorporating some of the following into your daily routine, especially in the morning. Remember that it is all about your mindset and choosing to be a better you.
- Breathe Deeply! Regular deep breathing lowers cortisol levels and helps to control stress.
- Move Your Body! No-brainer. Regular exercise of any kind is better than sitting and doing nothing. Remember those dance parties I mentioned before? That counts! Just move!
- Nourish Your Body with Real Food. Shop the perimeter of your grocery store or take advantage of your local farmer’s market. Be able to pronounce your ingredients and nourish your body from the inside out.
- Hydrate! Not only will it curb cravings for comfort food, it will help to keep your mind and body in the best condition so you can focus on life.
- Use Essential Oils for Stress and Mood Support. Explore this website for the best options for you!
- Celebrate Wins! If you don’t, who will?
- Smile! Little effort, big reward! Your body releases endorphins, the feel-good hormone, so you get an instant natural high!
- Compliments! Be intentional about giving compliments to 3 people a day. Make them smile! The effect will multiply.
- Meditate or Pray. Find some quiet time to reflect and choose gratitude. Breathe deeply and just be for a few minutes at the least. Find peace in the small moments.
- Express Gratitude. Appreciate the joy in your life, especially the people, and let them know. It helps me to focus on the positive and realize how blessed I am.
YOU’RE THE BOSS!
You are the CEO of your life, so every choice you make should support who you are. It will make all the difference in the world. If you are ready to get started, I have created the perfect Self Care Wellness Ritual Guide with my favorite recipes. Download it and get started on your journey to a more successful you with self-care routines!